My eyes are burning tonight. I've gotten entirely too little sleep in the last 36 hours. I should probably be sleeping now, but down time seems fewer and farther between anymore so I am choosing to take this time to post instead. I want to get back into writing more than once a month. Helps de-clutter the mind and stuff.
This past weekend was me and O.C.'s 1-year anniversary. If I had all the money in the world, or even just a little more than I do now, I could have done something spectacular to take her breath away. Unfortunately, I have recently adopted a fairly strict (in my terms) budget that involves a lot less spending and a lot more saving. The good news is A. she doesn't expect me to drop money on her and understands that saving is key and B. is so cute she managed a perfect date for us on a very small budget. So the day was saved and the evening was amazing even though I am a poor, starving artist. We ended up having a picnic by the lake and then went back to her place (soon to be our place) and watched a movie, split desert and exchanged cards and maybe a few kisses. It was cute, and perfect, and made me love her even more, if you can believe that.
I'm so thankful to have her in my life, especially now as I find myself faced with truly daunting feat: growing up. I keep reminding my parents, and often times myself it seems, that I am an adult. I am 25. Good God, when did I get so old? It's scary. No one ever said it'd be this hard. Growing up, while it is better than the alternative, sucks sometimes. It really calms me to know that I don't have to go it alone though. I have a backbone, a shoulder to lean on and a friend I can count on no matter what the occasion and it's all in my girlfriend. She tells me that I calm her, and give her something to look forward to when the days are long an stressful. I hope she knows I feel the exact same about her.
Sometimes, when I think about the future, I really can't imagine a life without her. I know that sounds like nothing new and super cliche. Just another honeymooner, young love rant that will fade with time. But I truly do love her with all of me and would never do anything to compromise this relationship and believe whole heartedly that she feels the same for me. I trust her more than I trust myself. That's a scary and kinda cool thing. Scary, because before I met her I was pretty set in stone about not believing in absolutes. Fearing them even. Now I'm saying things like forever, and never, and meaning them. I can't say for certain when that happened, but I feel like there is no going back. Not without a fight and a shit ton of heartbreak to go with it. Fingers crossed that it doesn't turn out that way. I've tried heartache, it's good for song-writing but crappy for just about everything else. I choose love. And this time, it chose me back.
Well, I think I am done thinking out loud for tonight. It's time to rest these ojos of mine so I can be functional for another busy day tomorrow! Hope all is well elsewhere in your worlds! Peace.
This past weekend was me and O.C.'s 1-year anniversary. If I had all the money in the world, or even just a little more than I do now, I could have done something spectacular to take her breath away. Unfortunately, I have recently adopted a fairly strict (in my terms) budget that involves a lot less spending and a lot more saving. The good news is A. she doesn't expect me to drop money on her and understands that saving is key and B. is so cute she managed a perfect date for us on a very small budget. So the day was saved and the evening was amazing even though I am a poor, starving artist. We ended up having a picnic by the lake and then went back to her place (soon to be our place) and watched a movie, split desert and exchanged cards and maybe a few kisses. It was cute, and perfect, and made me love her even more, if you can believe that.
I'm so thankful to have her in my life, especially now as I find myself faced with truly daunting feat: growing up. I keep reminding my parents, and often times myself it seems, that I am an adult. I am 25. Good God, when did I get so old? It's scary. No one ever said it'd be this hard. Growing up, while it is better than the alternative, sucks sometimes. It really calms me to know that I don't have to go it alone though. I have a backbone, a shoulder to lean on and a friend I can count on no matter what the occasion and it's all in my girlfriend. She tells me that I calm her, and give her something to look forward to when the days are long an stressful. I hope she knows I feel the exact same about her.
Sometimes, when I think about the future, I really can't imagine a life without her. I know that sounds like nothing new and super cliche. Just another honeymooner, young love rant that will fade with time. But I truly do love her with all of me and would never do anything to compromise this relationship and believe whole heartedly that she feels the same for me. I trust her more than I trust myself. That's a scary and kinda cool thing. Scary, because before I met her I was pretty set in stone about not believing in absolutes. Fearing them even. Now I'm saying things like forever, and never, and meaning them. I can't say for certain when that happened, but I feel like there is no going back. Not without a fight and a shit ton of heartbreak to go with it. Fingers crossed that it doesn't turn out that way. I've tried heartache, it's good for song-writing but crappy for just about everything else. I choose love. And this time, it chose me back.
Well, I think I am done thinking out loud for tonight. It's time to rest these ojos of mine so I can be functional for another busy day tomorrow! Hope all is well elsewhere in your worlds! Peace.
I've commented before and I just wanted to say congrats on your 1 year anniversary and I need to find an O.C of my own! :-)
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